Friday, 31 August 2007

Never eat anything bigger than your head......

Standing in front of the fridge this morning, I was overcome with a feeling of deja vu - I was SURE I had been here recently, just like this, nightgown all lopsided and falling off my shoulder, hair miserably askew and sticking out in all the wrong places - except - and here's the difference - last time I was looking at full shelves of puddings and jellies and even some cake from marks and sparks - but NOOOOOOOOO - now all there was before me were empty metal shelves and the distinct smell of old spilled milk.
Curiously, the waste can was full of wrappers and I detected a slight bulge to my stomach. I closed the door and surveyed the countertops. Crumbs, used utensils, empty cups. What's all this then? Had I a visitor last night? A party more likely - ! Who ate all this food and why wasn't I invited? I DO live alone, and if someone had decided to throw an impromptu party at my house, you WOULD think they would have had the courtesy to invite me!
Sudden nausea overtook my indignation and I headed to the toilet. The telltale Ambien headache started to invade my cranium just at the moment when I discovered where all that food had disappeared to.
I MUST stop with the Bedfordshire cocktails (Ambien + Mojito - although any cocktail will do in a pinch!

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